Can't figure it out

I really can't figure this out. For a few days I have been weird having highs and lows I will be really happy then be really sad and depressed. I want to chock it up to hormones since it is recent and I know that as I lose weight my hormones will start to change and even out. I just don't know what to do right now. My music of choice has been nickelback and creed. Particularly two creed songs( below) I know why with open arms appeals to me so. I want more than anything to be a mom. I want that song to be sung and dedicated to me or at least for it to mean something to some guy about me. My baby syndrome is just getting worse since jessie found out she is pregnant. It is just so unfair. The other I find relates to me and my friends. I feel like My friends are slowly drifting away from me. The people I once spent hours and hours talking to and joking with now aren't around as much, we don't talk as much I feel myself slipping from reality, my friends are my fire, my lifeline. Without them...I am nothing. Completely and utterly nothing. I won't let this derail my weight loss journey not one iota. I need to lose this weight for my health, for me, for my future kids...so I can get pregnant. I just can't help but feel n unbelievable sadness all I want to do sometimes is break down and cry. I have not been an emotional person much and I have noticed that ever since I have started losing weight it has been an emotional rollercoster for me ups and downs, I am more susceptible to emotions and to crying wheres before I would go years without shedding a tear. I just can't seem to go a day without this sadness lately. I miss my friends so much. They mean so much to me I just wish I didn't feel so lost.

4!!

Day 4 of 100% I REALLY think I can do this!! :D

Breakfast: Turkey sandwich and watermelon 300

Lunch: Tuna an chips 460

Total so far: 760

Snack: Almonds 100

Total so far: 860

Snack: ice cream cone 200

Total so far: 1060

Dinner: Sandwich and chips 350

Total for today:1410

WOOHOO!!! I like the results!!

Stepped on the scale today out of SHEER curiosity 268.4!!! WOOOHOOOOO!!! I LOVE it!!! can't wait to get more active and lose more weight! I really feel like im doing something right and can't wait to see how much weight I lose at the end of this 100 days. Where this is day 3!!

Breakfast: Bagel and cream cheese with watermelon 210

Snack: Taste of sister's meat her boyfriend grilled 30

Total so far: 240

Snack: Almonds 140

Total so far: 380

Snack: Chips: 160

Total so far: 540

Dinner: Shrimp stir fry, egg rolls and fried pork 800

Total so far: 1340

Snack: egg roll 120

Total for today: 1460

day 2 100%

im gonna beat them all on sargs boot camp thread muahaaha

breakfast: peanutt butter toast and 2 plums 250

Snack: 4 almonds 28

Total so far: 278

lunch: Bagel with cream cheese, avacado and spinach 338

Total so far: 616

Snack: almonds, swiss cheese and celery 240

Total so far: 856

Dinner: Chicken and veggie stir fry plus rice 443

Total for today: 1299

annoyed at the scale

I am sooo annoyed at my scale Grr. Every other time I stepped on it I got 272 then 269.8 then 272 then 269.8 like really????sigh I went with 269.8 :D

Breakfast: Sandwich with strawberries 285

Snack: 19 almonds, 1/4 a canteloupe, 2 sweedish fish 222

Total so far: 507

Snack: Hummus and celery 100

Total so far: 607

Snack: Roast beef 100

Total so far: 707

Dinner: chicken burgers and rice 680

Total so far: 1387

Snack: almonds 98

Total for today: 1485

water weight

Grrs Im up on the scale today, weigh in day is tomorrow but jeeezz I think its cause of my calisthenics I performes last night but come on! I need to figure out how to shed the water weight like TODAY! I don't want it there when I weigh in tomorrow :\


Breakfast: Almonds and a nectarine 280

Lunch: 2 sandwiches 470

total so far: 750

Dinner: Salad 325

Total so far: 1075

Snack: Almonds 154

Total for today: 1229

loonng day

Breakfast: salad 290

Snack: popcorn chicken 30

Total so far: 320

Lunch: cherry, sandwich, almonds and cherrys 393

Total so far: 713

Snack: M&m mcflurry 413

Total so far: 1126

Dinner: Fried chicken 600

Total for today: 1726