PCOS and Me

It's been a long road since I have started this blog, I've lost, I've gained. Heck, I have even stayed the same. Since seeing my nutritionist I gained about 40 Lbs and have managed to get 10 ish off. I hear from others with PCOS that this has happened to them too. I can't believe I made the mistake of changing what I knew works and attempting something else. If it isn't broken, Don't fix it! after a long time of denying the gain and pigging out I am back and ready to get this off NOW. I don't want it off 3 years from now or to gain another 40 lbs and be back where I started. I am battling my weight for my health and my future and I WON'T lose. My weight won this battle, but it hasn't won the war and it won't. I've been doing "OK". The first few days I was definately over on my calories but ate relatively healthy and got most of my water in so I am ok with that. Since then I have been right around where I need to be, only a few calories over if any (Less than 50 over) which is where I want to be.

Classes start again on monday so I will need to figure out how to combat boredom while in school. Boredom is one of the things that makes me want to eat sadly :\ I think being in class in general is bad for me, I usually feel odd if I am not eating while in class I don't know why.

Anyway, I need to get this 30 lbs off and then the 45 after that. I can't be fat forever, I need the weight gone now. what sucks the most? None of my pants fit me PERIOD. I can't wear them, they are all to small :\. I am stuck in sweats, pajama pants and dresses/skirts in the middle of winter *cries* Even worse, I went to go bridesmaid dress and winter coat shopping last week OMG. I wanted to cry in the stores. LOVED the first dress we chose but..It didn't come in the size I needed and It was too tight in the size I tried on >.<. The coats? well couldn't get one of those either, nothing fit and I KNOW if I hadn't gained the weight I could have found something. Sigh.

Anyway that is all for now, I know I always say it but I am going to try to keep up here, this helped me before when I was losing weight so we will see.